Grade 5 Chapter 20: Our Emotional World

Topics covered: Understanding emotions, Coping with emotions, Awareness of our own flaws, We can change, Harmful effects of anger, Self-observation.

Understanding Emotions

Human nature has many different aspects. Sometimes, a person gets very angry; at other times, he is ready to forget and forgive easily. At times, he is jealous; at times he is loving. Sometimes, he acts selfishly, but sometimes he is willing to make a sacrifice for others and comes forward to help. Anger, joy, sorrow, jealousy, disappointment, fear, etc. are all emotions.

Coping with Our Emotions

Try this.

Note your feelings about the following and write them down.

1. Your own behaviour from the time you wake up in the morning till you go to bed.
2. Pictures of natural disasters in the newspaper.
3. News about a cricket match in the newspaper.
4. Anger at your classmates.
5. The tricks that jokers play in a circus.

[Note: Students should refer to the image showing various emotions on page 103 of their textbook.]

Just as man is able to think, he is also emotional. We should be able to strike a balance between our thoughts and emotions. When someone hurts us, we feel sad. This is natural; however, we should know how bad to feel about it. If someone does something wrong, we get angry; however, we must not lose our temper. It is natural to desire something but we must not be greedy for it. If we think properly, we can control our emotions. Emotional adjustment involves coping with your emotions, being able to control them and expressing them in a reasonable manner.

When we learn to cope with our emotions, our personality becomes balanced, our ability to understand others increases and we can overcome adverse conditions. Then we become free from faults such as blaming others unnecessarily, calling them names and not being able to tolerate their success. We become happy and our ability to relate to others improves. We learn not to be stubborn.

Can you tell?

Are the following persons coping well with their emotions? Put (✓) if they are, put (✗) if they aren’t.

• Chhaya and Meena usually make equal progress in their studies. The teacher praised Chhaya’s essay. This made Meena angry and she decided not to speak to Chhaya. (✗)
• Dinesh took Manoj’s pen and pencil from his bag and hid them. Later, he said, ‘Sorry’ to Manoj and promised not to do it again. (✓)
• Sunita wanted to go to the market with her mother, but for some reason, her mother had to leave early. Sunita was angry with her mother. But later, she asked her mother the reason why she had to leave early. Her anger subsided when she learnt the reason. (✓)
• Ramesh told Suresh that Amit had said something bad about him. Suresh decided to react only after confirming the facts. (✓)

Awareness of Our Own Flaws

Children are often heard to say ‘My handwriting is beautiful’, ‘I am good at maths’, ‘I like science’ or ‘I like poetry’. This means that people’s likes and dislikes and capabilities can be different. Just as we gradually understand what we can do, we must also understand what we are not able to do. We may be good at some subject, art or sport and just as bad at another. We must know our flaws as well as our talents, so that we can improve upon them. Just because we are unable to do something, it does not mean that we stop trying to excel at what we can do.

We Can Change

No person is entirely good or entirely bad. We must always think about the good qualities or virtues in our friends first. We must help each other to get rid of our flaws. If we speak about our flaws as openly as we speak about our talents, it will be to our advantage.

Can you tell?

Anger is an emotion just like happiness or sadness. All of us get angry about something at some point of time. We get angry if something does not happen according to our wishes, or if we are insulted. Similarly, we also get angry if we see someone being ill-treated. If we get angry very often, or if we cannot control our anger, it can have adverse effects on our body and mind. We become short-tempered and stubborn. Our attitude of co-operation and understanding decreases and we hurt others. We face consequences such as headaches, loss of sleep and dullness.

What would you do?

1. Ranjit and Abhay are fighting over who gets to sit on the first bench. They are both very angry. They are close to throwing each other’s bags.

   Solution: I would suggest they take turns sitting on the first bench or find a fair way to decide, like drawing lots. I would remind them that fighting is not a good way to solve problems and can hurt their friendship.

2. Hemant wants to take part in the kabbadi competition, but he is shy. He is nervous about telling it to the teacher.

   Solution: I would encourage Hemant and offer to go with him to talk to the teacher. I would tell him that it's okay to be shy, but it's important to express what he wants.

3. Rekha accidentally took Nisha’s notebook home.

   Solution: I would advise Rekha to immediately return the notebook to Nisha and apologize for the mistake. Honesty is important.

Can you tell?

1. Manoj says, “I’m going to school!” and instead goes to the playground to play. Is this correct? (✗)

   Explanation: This is not correct. It is important to be honest and responsible, and to go where you are supposed to go.

2. What will you tell a friend who has a habit of borrowing things and not returning them on time?

   Solution: I would politely tell my friend that it's important to return borrowed items on time because others might need them. I would explain that not returning things can cause inconvenience and affect trust.

Once we know the flaws in our nature, we must try to correct them ourselves.

Neha talks the most in her group. Her friends began to avoid her since they never got a chance to speak. Neha realized this. Then, she began to watch out how much she spoke. She told her friends herself, “Stop me if I talk too much.” Gradually, Neha began to listen to others and brought about a change in her own behaviour.

Aspects of our nature that bother us and others can be changed. However, we ourselves must try hard to change them. Otherwise, these aspects may take the shape of flaws in our personality.

Always remember -

• Emotions must be expressed. There must be a balance between our thoughts and emotions.
• Anger must be controlled, otherwise it can have adverse effects on our mind and body.
• We must be aware of our flaws as well as our talents.
• We can try to correct the flaws in our nature.

What we have learnt -

• Just as man is able to think, he is also emotional.
• Emotional adjustment involves coping with your emotions, being able to control them and expressing them in a reasonable manner.
• When we learn to cope with our emotions, our personality becomes balanced.
• We must be aware of our flaws as well as our talents.
• We can try to correct the flaws in our nature through self-effort.
• Uncontrolled anger can have adverse effects on our mind and body.

Exercises

1. Fill in the blanks.
   1. Just as man is able to think, he is also emotional.
   2. We must always think about the good qualities in our friends first.
2. Answer in one sentence.
   1. How does a balanced personality develop?

      Answer: A balanced personality develops when we learn to cope with our emotions, control them, and express them reasonably.

   2. Why does our attitude of co-operation and understanding decrease?

      Answer: Our attitude of co-operation and understanding decreases if we get angry very often or cannot control our anger.

   3. What must we do after we have found the flaws in our nature?

      Answer: After we have found the flaws in our nature, we must try to correct them ourselves.

3. Answer in short.
   1. What is meant by ‘coping with emotions’?

      Answer: Coping with emotions means being able to control them and expressing them in a reasonable manner, striking a balance between thoughts and emotions.

   2. What are the harmful effects of anger?

      Answer: Harmful effects of anger include becoming short-tempered and stubborn, decreased co-operation and understanding, hurting others, headaches, loss of sleep, and dullness.

   3. Why must we know our flaws?

      Answer: We must know our flaws so that we can improve upon them and work towards a balanced personality.

4. Write how you will react:
   1. Your teacher does not listen to you.

      Reaction: I would try to understand why the teacher might not be listening, perhaps by rephrasing my question or asking at a more appropriate time. If it's a misunderstanding, I would politely clarify.

   2. Your parents ask for your opinion while making decisions.

      Reaction: I would feel valued and happy. I would think carefully and give my honest opinion, explaining my reasons.

   3. Your friend got a big prize.

      Reaction: I would feel happy and proud of my friend's achievement and congratulate them sincerely.

   4. Your classmates praise you.

      Reaction: I would feel happy and thankful for their appreciation. It would encourage me to continue doing well.

   5. Rohan insulted you in class.

      Reaction: I would try to remain calm. Later, I would talk to Rohan privately and explain how his words made me feel, asking him not to do it again. If it continues, I would inform the teacher.

5. What will you do in this situation?
   1. Rohini won a prize in an essay competition.

      Action: I would congratulate Rohini and ask her about her essay and how she prepared. I might also learn from her success.

   2. Kavita refused to eat her tiffin because she was angry.

      Action: I would try to talk to Kavita calmly and understand why she is angry. I would explain that not eating is harmful to her health and encourage her to eat, perhaps offering to share my tiffin if she forgot hers.

   3. Veena keeps herself to herself at school.

      Action: I would try to include Veena in games and conversations, inviting her to join our group. I would be friendly and try to make her feel comfortable.

   4. Makarand says, “I can’t help it if I have a stubborn personality”.

      Action: I would explain to Makarand that while some traits are part of our nature, we can always work to improve ourselves. I would give examples of how being less stubborn can help him in friendships and learning, and offer support if he wants to try to change.

Activity: Complete the following table. Figure out your own personality with the help of your teacher.